hi! i have a save in my laptop files for the game, but when i upload it, it says save from the wrong game. Do you know why this is or if there is a way to fix it?
It unfortunately means your save file isn't compatible with the current version. With a WIP, it just happens sometimes when I fix a bug or update something. You'll have to replay the game from the beginning. Sorry for the inconvenience!
i finally finished reading all this. its a great story and im hooked. though i do think we should be able to customise the MCs personality a bit more and their emotions and reactions towards things. its an interesting read nonetheless, cant wait for more.
Thank you for your feedback! You are right, that is something I'm still trying to get better at. This is my first time writing a dynamic protagonist, so I'm still struggling with balancing the fact that they need to have inner conflict and character development with the fact that they are supposed to still have a malleable personality. I appreciate you letting me know that you feel something is lacking there.
Finished all the availabe chapters, i love the concept and writing, however, the conflict seems very one-sided to me (at least from what is currently published, this might change when it's finished). Humans want to take land from fae and not allow them in it? Pressumably already took down a lot of the forest, and yet this was never despicted as being bad in the writing (except for one time Lady Maeve mentioned it, to which the mc responded weirdly). The only critique humans recieved was being racist towards half-fae, meanwhile fae got vilified for simply not letting their homeland be taken from them. Right now it just seems that you either pick the colonizers (humans) or the colonized (fae), i thought it would be about both sides being equally bad/wrong. I do have high hopes for this though, so i expect to be wrong abt this (hopefully) :)
Thank you for your feedback! There's a few things to keep in mind:
1. Take every bit of information with a grain of salt. What Maeve tells you, what Az'Lean says, what MC thinks they know to be fact - it's all biased in some way.
2. Narratively, there wouldn't be much incentive to side with the fae and abandon everything you've ever known if the humans weren't flawed. So there is a bit more focus on that at first. (Though I do think that the writing makes it clear that the humans can be quite ruthless and vindictive. So I'm not sure what you mean by it not being depicted as bad?)
3. The fae have done some bad stuff, to be sure, like the assassination of the Queen, or stealing newborns from their families. MCs father seems to be traumatised from the battles he was in, and knights don't usually grow old.
4. Humans, as far as they know, arrived on the continent at the same time as the fae. The fae say humans arrived later and started taking land. At this point, it's impossible to know which version is true. That's why MC reacted that way - they don't just take Maeve's word for it.
5. When you look at the map, the kingdom is in the middle of the continent, while the fae lands surround it. If the humans were colonizers, you'd think they'd have settlements on the shore and expand from there. The fact that they don't doesn't have to mean anything, but I'd say it's an indicator that the situation isn't quite as clear cut.
I hope that could give you some reassurance that the conflict will indeed turn out to be nunanced!
I still have a feedback about the linearity of the story if that's ok ! (I'm not used to writing in english so I hope it's understandable ahah)
I like that we can choose between pro-fae or totally loyal to the kingdom, but I feel we can't really choose how MC feel about being a changeling sometimes.
For example when learning about the shapeshifting ability, MC seems always reluctant or even disgusted by this power. I imagined a more pragmatic MC who had time to accept their changeling status would see this as an interesting advantage to use for their goal (to help the fae or kingdom), or a scared MC could see this as a reassurance and a possible escape if their fae-nature is revealed. A more open-minded MC interested in magic and fae magic could be intrigued, etc...
It was just an instance that I remembered and I forgot some, but most of the time the MC reaction was aligned with what I would have chosen 😁
Thank you for your feedback! You're right, there are probably some scenes where I could have offered more variety in the way MC reacts. This is my first time writing a non-linear story, so I'm still figuring out where the line is between an MC who has a fixed background and personality, and an entirely blank slate. But I will take your feedback to heart and try to to offer more variety/choices in that regard.
Update was fantastic, this is a great work and you are a talented writer! There is only one tiny thing that bothered me in Ch. 4 and feel free to disregard the rest of this comment but as a horseman who did his main thesis on the genetics of horse coat coloration it will forever bother me when terms are mixed up. A chestnut horse would never have a black mane and tail, that would make the horse a bay, as chestnut horses by definition have manes and tails the same color as the rest of their coats. And I know it is silly, and they did the same thing in Dragon Age: Inquisition and it bothered me then too, so like I said you can ignore this because you really have done a wonderful job with this incredible story of yours! (I just really love horses, forgive me) 🐴
I didn't know that, thanks for telling me! I think it's awesome that you are so passionate about horses. Anyway, if that is your only complaint though, I can live with that, haha!
I have a minor question about the end of Chapter 2. Is it unavoidable that your disposition changes in regards to how calm you are? It seems like it might be, based on what happens, but I was curious.
That's correct. At certain points in the story your disposition will change regardless of your choices, but it's not permanent, just to show how the current situation is affecting the MC.
Thank you for making this story! I like all the characters so far (Even if I am suspicious of one of them...) and I look forward to seeing more of the story unfurl in the future! I wish I had the funds to donate to your patreon for this project.
Question about character creation. Are there/will there be points where the player can change their character's pronouns/name, or are the ones you pick at the beginning the ones your stuck with for the whole game?
If you don't mind me asking, is there a specific reason that in particular is something that won't be added, or is it just not in your current plans?
Cause if it's the later, I will say that with the way it is now i.e. choosing your character's pronouns as an infant, without any opportunities to change them, it at least to me, heavily implies, if not outright states, that the player character can't be trans.
Like sure the MC is a changeling, but they're seemingly still being put in a body with no real choice in the matter as an infant, so it seems to just be being assigned a gender at birth with extra steps.
Ah, I see what you mean. My thought process was that the character creation in the prologue was just that - you choosing what you want your character to be. Though I guess it comes across as a different character describing what your assigned gender at birth is, not what you actually identify as.
I'm non-binary myself so I would just choose "child" and they/them pronouns at the start, even though that obviously isn't my agab. I never considered someone might pick their assigned gender during character creation and then want to switch to their actual gender later down the line. Thank you for bringing that to my attention.
Would you say the time skip between chapter 1 and 2 would be a good place to allow for a change in pronouns and name? I think I could easily add that in the next update.
I did happen to uncover a bug however, but I am uncertain whether it is due to being on a pc or not. The game after a solid amount of time has the save interface going haywire. The save interface drastically shifts upward to the point where one can only see the "save to local system", and "load from local system". This forced me to consider using local save only, as halfway through the playthrough I would no longer be able to access the browser saves, unless of course I refresh the browser.
And from what I have seen so far there does not seem to be an option to change our fighting style (I have read up to the point where we get to converse with the horses). Another thing I would appreciate an answer on is whether or not we would be able to pick a side and actually have it affect the epilogue? For example, would we be able to support the fae, causing the epilogue to refer to us as living among them?
And please continue to lead us through this adventure... it is exhilarating. The combat was phenomenal, I felt invested and like an actual contender, as the battle seemed perfectly paced. Although I would have enjoyed more choices on our moveset.
That's a strange bug, not sure what caused it. Could you tell me what browser you played in and how many safe file slots you used?
At first, your fighting style will depend on which mentor you had, but you'll be able to adapt it over time. Yes, there will be different endings depending on your choices. Choosing a side will change the story drastically, so yes, your example is possible.
I'm currently using firefox. Do you think that may be the issue? I would code dive to better inform you but I'm currently unfamiliar with SugarCube code.
And thanks for the answer. I didn't know you could get a different mentor yet. I'll have to attempt again and see whether my mentor changes.
I've had issues with formatting not showing up correctly in firefox before, so it might be that. I'll look into it. In the mean time, try using a different browser.
i love the story so far! i cant wait to spend more time with Az'Lean and Lester is such an adorable asshole. though i did encounter this after the battle-
-but overall i am really enjoying it.
quick question : will there be a poly option ?(just wondering)
and also, what exactly does villain romance mean ?
I've been thinking about adding a poly option, but it's a lot of work. It's not off the table, but I want to focus on the individual romances first. But thanks for letting me know there's interest in them!
The idea is that, depending on your choices, some of the romance options might end up being the villains of your story (or you're the one in theirs). You can still pursue them though (at your own risk).
oh no problem work at your own pace ! (i just really like poly options so i ask on almost every IF i like)
i am also quite excited that the aspect of villain romances if it means i can do a enemy to lovers situation- or maybe a enemies with unresolved tension? anyway i look forward to the next update >o<
So I havent finished the demo yet but I did find a bug? I dont know if you meant to leave it like that or its an actual bug but uum (i know this games only been published for less than a day and a bug report so soon can be a bit disheartening but I really love this game! So keep up the work!)
For those who have not finished the game beware of spoilers!
Is it supposed to be like that? (Like you write it down and make the scene later then put it in) or is it really a bug? (Also Im playing this on mobile if that helps?)
I uuuh also found a typo..its its really small but... im just gonna put it here
The MC reactions matching their personality are so good, The little panic when they discover about all the fae thing and at the very same time i don't think they will see their birthday as the same thing anymore.
They're in a bad situation, and i feel for them when the prince finally discovers their champion fae like nature, after all that happened to his mum
I love Vynn and if anything happens to them my MC will most likely go mad
WHERE IS THE ORIGINAL BABY GRAHM? I hope they aren't hurt or dead ya know, if we ever meet them i hope they can forgive MC even if all the stuff that happened is actually things MC couldn't control or known.
Congrats on the demo release! And for it being pretty meaty to start off with. I'm definitely looking forward for more.
Question, although kinda spoilery
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After the scene where your MC looks in the mirror and realize they're a changeling, where the MC realizes there's no one to talk to but 'maybe there is something else that might help you in making sense of all of this,' is that meant to be the end of the demo? There's nothing for me to click to proceed, but also nothing clear saying this is the end of the demo, so wondering if it's the end or maybe there's something finicky (I played on mobile). Otherwise, greatly enjoyed! I think I noticed a few typos, something I can compile, but it all flows very well so far.
Also it doesn't seem like there's a back button like other twines I'm used to. Not really an issue, but intentional?
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hi! i have a save in my laptop files for the game, but when i upload it, it says save from the wrong game. Do you know why this is or if there is a way to fix it?
It unfortunately means your save file isn't compatible with the current version. With a WIP, it just happens sometimes when I fix a bug or update something. You'll have to replay the game from the beginning. Sorry for the inconvenience!
that makes sense! it's all good, i don't mind replaying again since its such a well-written story!
Glad to hear it!
i finally finished reading all this. its a great story and im hooked. though i do think we should be able to customise the MCs personality a bit more and their emotions and reactions towards things. its an interesting read nonetheless, cant wait for more.
Thank you for your feedback! You are right, that is something I'm still trying to get better at. This is my first time writing a dynamic protagonist, so I'm still struggling with balancing the fact that they need to have inner conflict and character development with the fact that they are supposed to still have a malleable personality. I appreciate you letting me know that you feel something is lacking there.
its fine, i completely understand, its a good plot either way.
Finished all the availabe chapters, i love the concept and writing, however, the conflict seems very one-sided to me (at least from what is currently published, this might change when it's finished). Humans want to take land from fae and not allow them in it? Pressumably already took down a lot of the forest, and yet this was never despicted as being bad in the writing (except for one time Lady Maeve mentioned it, to which the mc responded weirdly). The only critique humans recieved was being racist towards half-fae, meanwhile fae got vilified for simply not letting their homeland be taken from them. Right now it just seems that you either pick the colonizers (humans) or the colonized (fae), i thought it would be about both sides being equally bad/wrong. I do have high hopes for this though, so i expect to be wrong abt this (hopefully) :)
Thank you for your feedback! There's a few things to keep in mind:
1. Take every bit of information with a grain of salt. What Maeve tells you, what Az'Lean says, what MC thinks they know to be fact - it's all biased in some way.
2. Narratively, there wouldn't be much incentive to side with the fae and abandon everything you've ever known if the humans weren't flawed. So there is a bit more focus on that at first. (Though I do think that the writing makes it clear that the humans can be quite ruthless and vindictive. So I'm not sure what you mean by it not being depicted as bad?)
3. The fae have done some bad stuff, to be sure, like the assassination of the Queen, or stealing newborns from their families. MCs father seems to be traumatised from the battles he was in, and knights don't usually grow old.
4. Humans, as far as they know, arrived on the continent at the same time as the fae. The fae say humans arrived later and started taking land. At this point, it's impossible to know which version is true. That's why MC reacted that way - they don't just take Maeve's word for it.
5. When you look at the map, the kingdom is in the middle of the continent, while the fae lands surround it. If the humans were colonizers, you'd think they'd have settlements on the shore and expand from there. The fact that they don't doesn't have to mean anything, but I'd say it's an indicator that the situation isn't quite as clear cut.
I hope that could give you some reassurance that the conflict will indeed turn out to be nunanced!
I love this story so much, thanks for the update ! 😁
And thank you for reading! :)
I still have a feedback about the linearity of the story if that's ok ! (I'm not used to writing in english so I hope it's understandable ahah)
I like that we can choose between pro-fae or totally loyal to the kingdom, but I feel we can't really choose how MC feel about being a changeling sometimes.
For example when learning about the shapeshifting ability, MC seems always reluctant or even disgusted by this power. I imagined a more pragmatic MC who had time to accept their changeling status would see this as an interesting advantage to use for their goal (to help the fae or kingdom), or a scared MC could see this as a reassurance and a possible escape if their fae-nature is revealed. A more open-minded MC interested in magic and fae magic could be intrigued, etc...
It was just an instance that I remembered and I forgot some, but most of the time the MC reaction was aligned with what I would have chosen 😁
Thank you for your feedback! You're right, there are probably some scenes where I could have offered more variety in the way MC reacts. This is my first time writing a non-linear story, so I'm still figuring out where the line is between an MC who has a fixed background and personality, and an entirely blank slate. But I will take your feedback to heart and try to to offer more variety/choices in that regard.
Update was fantastic, this is a great work and you are a talented writer! There is only one tiny thing that bothered me in Ch. 4 and feel free to disregard the rest of this comment but as a horseman who did his main thesis on the genetics of horse coat coloration it will forever bother me when terms are mixed up. A chestnut horse would never have a black mane and tail, that would make the horse a bay, as chestnut horses by definition have manes and tails the same color as the rest of their coats. And I know it is silly, and they did the same thing in Dragon Age: Inquisition and it bothered me then too, so like I said you can ignore this because you really have done a wonderful job with this incredible story of yours! (I just really love horses, forgive me) 🐴
I didn't know that, thanks for telling me! I think it's awesome that you are so passionate about horses. Anyway, if that is your only complaint though, I can live with that, haha!
Feel free to ask if you ever need more horse facts, I will take any opportunity to spread my knowledge that seems useless to most of the modern world!
IT IS THE DAY
Have fun reading!
What a creative premise! I can't wait to prove my loyalty to my adoptive parents, prince and king.
Thanks! Sounds like you're proper Champion material!
This is awesome! I have a rather large amount of inside jokes about fae and changelings, and I love how this all plays out so far.
Glad to hear it!
Oop uhm I was trying to reply and I accidentally reported you, .I’m so sorry…. I don’t think it should do anything. Again, I’m really sorry.
Don't worry about it, accidents happen!
I still feel bad though- it shouldn’t do anything. Have a nice day and keep up the good writing and work!
I kinda stepped out of my comfort zone with this kinda game, and i am so glad i did, this is incredible dude. You got talent :)
Thanks! Glad you enjoyed it :)
I have a minor question about the end of Chapter 2. Is it unavoidable that your disposition changes in regards to how calm you are? It seems like it might be, based on what happens, but I was curious.
That's correct. At certain points in the story your disposition will change regardless of your choices, but it's not permanent, just to show how the current situation is affecting the MC.
Thank you for making this story! I like all the characters so far (Even if I am suspicious of one of them...) and I look forward to seeing more of the story unfurl in the future! I wish I had the funds to donate to your patreon for this project.
Glad you liked it! Don't worry about not being able to support me financially, just getting a nice comment like this is more than enough.
Question about character creation. Are there/will there be points where the player can change their character's pronouns/name, or are the ones you pick at the beginning the ones your stuck with for the whole game?
No, there probably won't be any opportunities to change your name/pronouns.
If you don't mind me asking, is there a specific reason that in particular is something that won't be added, or is it just not in your current plans?
Cause if it's the later, I will say that with the way it is now i.e. choosing your character's pronouns as an infant, without any opportunities to change them, it at least to me, heavily implies, if not outright states, that the player character can't be trans.
Like sure the MC is a changeling, but they're seemingly still being put in a body with no real choice in the matter as an infant, so it seems to just be being assigned a gender at birth with extra steps.
Ah, I see what you mean. My thought process was that the character creation in the prologue was just that - you choosing what you want your character to be. Though I guess it comes across as a different character describing what your assigned gender at birth is, not what you actually identify as.
I'm non-binary myself so I would just choose "child" and they/them pronouns at the start, even though that obviously isn't my agab. I never considered someone might pick their assigned gender during character creation and then want to switch to their actual gender later down the line. Thank you for bringing that to my attention.
Would you say the time skip between chapter 1 and 2 would be a good place to allow for a change in pronouns and name? I think I could easily add that in the next update.
I am enjoying reading your work.
I did happen to uncover a bug however, but I am uncertain whether it is due to being on a pc or not. The game after a solid amount of time has the save interface going haywire. The save interface drastically shifts upward to the point where one can only see the "save to local system", and "load from local system". This forced me to consider using local save only, as halfway through the playthrough I would no longer be able to access the browser saves, unless of course I refresh the browser.
And from what I have seen so far there does not seem to be an option to change our fighting style (I have read up to the point where we get to converse with the horses). Another thing I would appreciate an answer on is whether or not we would be able to pick a side and actually have it affect the epilogue? For example, would we be able to support the fae, causing the epilogue to refer to us as living among them?
And please continue to lead us through this adventure... it is exhilarating. The combat was phenomenal, I felt invested and like an actual contender, as the battle seemed perfectly paced. Although I would have enjoyed more choices on our moveset.
That's a strange bug, not sure what caused it. Could you tell me what browser you played in and how many safe file slots you used?
At first, your fighting style will depend on which mentor you had, but you'll be able to adapt it over time. Yes, there will be different endings depending on your choices. Choosing a side will change the story drastically, so yes, your example is possible.
Thank you very much for your feedback!
I'm currently using firefox. Do you think that may be the issue? I would code dive to better inform you but I'm currently unfamiliar with SugarCube code.
And thanks for the answer. I didn't know you could get a different mentor yet. I'll have to attempt again and see whether my mentor changes.
I've had issues with formatting not showing up correctly in firefox before, so it might be that. I'll look into it. In the mean time, try using a different browser.
Absolutely loved reading this, the writing is amazing! Can't wait for more updates<333
Thank you! Glad you liked it! :)
Lovely story, really immersive but i want to ask, is the 'your fighting style' in 'character' suppose to be empty or ...?
No, it shouldn't be empty. Thanks for letting me know, I'll make sure to fix it!
i love the story so far! i cant wait to spend more time with Az'Lean and Lester is such an adorable asshole. though i did encounter this after the battle-
-but overall i am really enjoying it.
quick question : will there be a poly option ?(just wondering)
and also, what exactly does villain romance mean ?
Thank you for letting me know, I'll fix it ASAP.
I've been thinking about adding a poly option, but it's a lot of work. It's not off the table, but I want to focus on the individual romances first. But thanks for letting me know there's interest in them!
The idea is that, depending on your choices, some of the romance options might end up being the villains of your story (or you're the one in theirs). You can still pursue them though (at your own risk).
oh no problem work at your own pace ! (i just really like poly options so i ask on almost every IF i like)
i am also quite excited that the aspect of villain romances if it means i can do a enemy to lovers situation- or maybe a enemies with unresolved tension? anyway i look forward to the next update >o<
So I havent finished the demo yet but I did find a bug? I dont know if you meant to leave it like that or its an actual bug but uum (i know this games only been published for less than a day and a bug report so soon can be a bit disheartening but I really love this game! So keep up the work!)
For those who have not finished the game beware of spoilers!
Is it supposed to be like that? (Like you write it down and make the scene later then put it in) or is it really a bug? (Also Im playing this on mobile if that helps?)
I uuuh also found a typo..its its really small but... im just gonna put it here
Yeah, a few others have mentioned this bug already, I'll fix it ASAP. Thanks for letting me know! And for the typo too! :)
I loved the game so much
The MC reactions matching their personality are so good, The little panic when they discover about all the fae thing and at the very same time i don't think they will see their birthday as the same thing anymore.
They're in a bad situation, and i feel for them when the prince finally discovers their champion fae like nature, after all that happened to his mum
I love Vynn and if anything happens to them my MC will most likely go mad
WHERE IS THE ORIGINAL BABY GRAHM? I hope they aren't hurt or dead ya know, if we ever meet them i hope they can forgive MC even if all the stuff that happened is actually things MC couldn't control or known.
Aww, thank you! Glad to hear you enjoyed it :)
yes,love it, yes is the answer. Kudos to you dear <3
Thank you! :)
Congrats on the demo release! And for it being pretty meaty to start off with. I'm definitely looking forward for more.
Question, although kinda spoilery
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.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
After the scene where your MC looks in the mirror and realize they're a changeling, where the MC realizes there's no one to talk to but 'maybe there is something else that might help you in making sense of all of this,' is that meant to be the end of the demo? There's nothing for me to click to proceed, but also nothing clear saying this is the end of the demo, so wondering if it's the end or maybe there's something finicky (I played on mobile). Otherwise, greatly enjoyed! I think I noticed a few typos, something I can compile, but it all flows very well so far.
Also it doesn't seem like there's a back button like other twines I'm used to. Not really an issue, but intentional?
Thank you for your comment!
Yeah, there should've been one more scene after that. I just tried to fix it, hopefully everything works now.
Yes, that's intentional. I feel like it adds more weight to the choices if they can't be undone.